just survived the first fart of the relationship.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
