Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize