...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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