How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
