All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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