Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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