dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
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