I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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