Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
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