im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
That reminds me...we need to get swords
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
i think i just lost a toe
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
