I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
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