Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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