i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Randomize
