Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Randomize
