I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
