Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
