Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
