the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Randomize
