I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
