Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
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