why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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