Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
