Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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