Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize