he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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