I think my vagina is haunted
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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