If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
