so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
