So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
You may now shotgun with the bride
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
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