Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
