it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize