ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
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