I don't think brook has ever known best
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Randomize
