just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
