she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Randomize
