It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
