That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
