STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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