so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
