I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
he was CRYING into my vagina
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Randomize
