He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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