wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
