He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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