I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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