I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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