So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
