god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize