he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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