you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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