i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
